LiveDifferent Circles
Who’s hosting?
Host crash course · about 15 min

Training.

All it takes is heart.

You don’t need experience to lead a Circle. You need a willingness to learn. The videos do the presenting; your job is to go first, listen well and say thanks.

Your training steps.

Step 1Host crash course

12 minutes, straight through

The four-step formula

Every round, the same 4 steps.

  1. Say which way you’ll go around the circle.
  2. Remind everyone they can share, pass, or say “come back to me.”
  3. Go first. Tell a story, not a summary.
  4. After each person: reflect it back in a sentence and thank them.

Next: read your first Host Card (your episode guide) and think of your own answer to each question.

The essentials.

Go firstAnswer the question first, with a real story. How long you share is how long everyone shares.
Listen with your whole selfLean in, make eye contact. Listen with your eyes, your ears and your heart.
Reflect and thank“It sounds like when you went through ___, you felt ___. Thank you for sharing that.”
It’s community, not therapyYour job is to listen, not to teach or give advice. If something worries you, tell your teacher right after the session.
Values & Agreements

We are committed to kindness. Our goal is not to argue or debate, but make people feel heard, understood and encouraged.

We desire to develop. Each of us has the potential to become a better version of ourselves and we are eager to learn and grow.

We are connected in cause. This experience is not just about our individual selves, but how we as a group can make a meaningful impact on the world around us.

It’s a Judgement-Free Zone. In a Circle, we drop our judgements and simply listen with open hearts.

What happens in the Circle, stays in the Circle. What is shared in the Circle, stays here and is kept confidential, unless it concerns anyone’s safety.

Anyone can share, pass, or say “come-back-to-me” A Circle is a zero pressure environment. It’s OK if you need to pass on a question, or, if you need a little more time before answering, just say “come-back-to-me”.

Listen deeply, one person at a time. In a Circle, one person at a time shares while everyone else listens deeply, without interrupting.

Share stories, not summaries

“It was difficult in grade three when I got picked on a lot” is a summary. A story paints a picture: the first day of grade three, walking in, seeing your seat is beside the kid who made last year miserable.

When you tell a story, everyone else starts telling stories too. Look at the questions a day or two ahead and think of a real moment from your own life.

Listen with RAP

Reflect. Say back what you heard. “So what you’re saying is…”

Ask. Ask a question about what they said before you jump in with your own story.

Posture. Uncross your arms, lean in, make eye contact, put distractions away.

Managing time

Use a timer. Pick a length for each question (6, 8 or 10 minutes) and stick to it.

Hosts share for one to two minutes. How long you share is how long everyone shares.

Tight on time? Make one question a one-word or one-sentence round. The icebreaker question is usually the one.

Handling tricky moments

Interruptions. Remind the group of the agreement: one person at a time. Don’t call anyone out in front of the group. Praise in public, critique in private.

Going over time. Gently step in, say you’d love to hear more, and that you want everyone to get a turn. Then follow up with them afterwards.

Always passing. Passing is OK. Thank them for being there. It can take two or three sessions before someone opens up.

Strong emotions. Thank them and normalise it: “feelings are meant to be felt.”

Phones. At the start of the next round, ask everyone to put phones on silent and away.

Making people feel welcome

Radical hospitality. Go above and beyond so people can tell you want them there: a big sign, balloons on the first day, a snack on each chair, someone greeting people at the door. It’s everyone’s job.

The five-second rule. When you think “I should say hi,” do it within five seconds. Being welcoming is a skill you can practise, even if you’re not naturally outgoing.

Set up the room on purpose. Chairs in a circle with nothing in between, and make it obvious where people go when they walk in.